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My inner guidance broke after my divorce. I had such a difficult time making rational decisions and attracted bad people and situations. Divorce or breakup can be one of the most challenging times in life.

When emotions run high and have lost your sense of self, rational decisions can be difficult to make, especially when the future seems uncertain.

It’s critical to make wise choices during this time in order to create a positive path forward. That’s why I have compiled five strategies for rational decision making after divorce or breakup.

Key Takeaways:

  • Divorce or breakup can be an emotional and uncertain time, making it essential to make rational decisions.
  • Setting clear goals, seeking professional support, and assessing the pros and cons of different choices are all critical strategies for making sound decisions.
  • Gathering relevant information and understanding and managing emotions are also crucial components of rational decision making.

Understanding Your Emotions

Understanding Your Emotions

After a divorce or breakup, it’s common to experience a range of emotions. Dealing with a mix of emotions, including sadness, relief, and confusion, can be quite challenging. However, it’s essential to take the time to understand and process your emotions before making any significant decisions.

Emotional healing is a critical part of the decision-making process. Looking after your mental well-being is key to making wise choices and moving forward positively. You must give yourself permission to feel your emotions fully and seek support from loved ones, a transformational coach or a therapist if necessary.

When I was navigating this challenging time, I had to remind myself that my emotions are a natural response to a significant life change. I was mourning the end of a thirteen-year marriage.

By acknowledging and understanding my feelings, I began to heal and make informed decisions about my future.

Setting Clear Goals

Setting Clear Goals

After my divorce, I felt lost and uncertain about the future. That’s when I realized I needed to set clear goals for myself to move forward. Whether you’re going through a divorce or a breakup, it’s important to define your priorities and create a roadmap for achieving your dreams.

Setting goals after divorce or breakup can help you:

  • Stay focused on what matters most.
  • Regain a sense of control over your life.
  • Reconnect with your true self.
  • Find motivation and purpose.
  • Break down overwhelming tasks into manageable steps.

To set clear goals, start by envisioning your ideal future. What kind of life do you want to create for yourself? What values and aspirations will guide your decisions?

Next, break down your vision into specific, measurable goals. Make sure each goal is achievable and relevant to your overall vision. Use a timeline to track your progress and hold yourself accountable.

In my journey, I have come across countless tools and resources that’s helped me rebuild my life after divorce. One book that has truly made a profound impact on my life and I know will do the same for you as it has for my clients is Atomic Habits by James Clear.

This incredible guide was like a trusted friend, offering valuable insights and actionable steps to not only create good habits but to also break free from the patterns that no longer serve you.

It helped me understand the science behind habit formation, making it easier to implement lasting changes. It’s truly a game changer.

Remember, setting goals isn’t just about achieving outcomes. It’s about creating a process for personal growth and development and finding fulfillment in the journey.

"The only limit to our realization of tomorrow will be our doubts of today." - Franklin D. Roosevelt

By setting clear goals, you can lay the foundation for a bright and fulfilling future. Take the time to reflect on your priorities and aspirations and commit yourself to taking action toward your dreams.

Seeking Professional Support

During the difficult time after a divorce or breakup, it’s important to seek professional support to assist in the decision-making process. Working with a transformational coach or therapist can help you sort through your emotions and make better choices with confidence.

There are many types of professional support available, such as individual coaching or therapy and group coaching or therapy.

If you’re looking for a trustworthy and private space to dig deep into your emotions and learn more about yourself, transformational coaching or therapy might be a good option.

They can help you recognize any patterns in your actions, deal with any lingering feelings, and teach you useful ways to handle stress and nervousness. Couples counseling can be especially helpful for those who are co-parenting or trying to navigate a post-breakup relationship.

While seeking professional support may seem daunting, remember that it is a sign of strength to reach out for help when you need it. If you’re going through a tough time, seeking help from a transformational coach or therapist can be a really great way to get the support you need to rebuild your life.

They can offer valuable guidance and help you work through any challenges you may be facing.

Schedule your free 15-minute video consultation call with me.

Gathering Information: A Vital Strategy for Rational Decision Making After Breakup

After ending a relationship, it’s natural to feel uncertain about the future. Making life-altering decisions can sometimes feel like a lot to handle. That’s why gathering information is a vital strategy to make informed and rational choices. It was so helpful when I leaned on my ability to research a particular topic to make informed decisions.

Research is the first step in gathering information. You can start by looking online, visiting your local library or asking friends and family for recommendations. Look for credible sources of information that can help you make decisions.

Resources are also essential for making rational decisions. Take advantage of any resources available to you such as legal aid or support groups. These resources can provide valuable insight and help you understand your options.

When gathering information, it’s important to be thorough and consider all options. Don’t rush into making decisions without weighing the pros and cons. Take the time to evaluate your options and understand their potential outcomes.

The more information you have, the better equipped you are to make rational decisions. Take your time to gather information and evaluate your options before making any life-altering decisions.


Going through a divorce or breakup can be one of the most challenging experiences in life. It’s a time when emotions are high, and making even the simplest decisions can feel overwhelming. It’s important to always keep in mind that this too shall pass, and with the right attitude and strategies, it’s more than possible to come out of it stronger and wiser.

When I implemented the four strategies for rational decision making after my divorce, I was able to make clear and thoughtful choices to start building the life I wanted.

By taking time to heal emotionally, setting clear goals, seeking professional support and gathering relevant information, I was able to make rational choices with confidence and intention.

Always be mindful that the decisions made during this time shape the future. You cast a vote for the person you want to be and the life you want to have with every choice you make.

It’s essential to take control of the situation and not let emotions cloud judgment. By keeping a clear head and following these strategies, your future can be filled with possibilities, opportunities, and happiness.

Frequently Asked Questions

A: It is important to allow yourself to heal emotionally before making important decisions. Take time to process your emotions and seek support from friends, family, a transformational coach or therapist.

Taking care of yourself and finding ways to heal emotionally is super important! Make sure you set aside time for self-care and do things that bring you joy and make you feel good.

A: Setting clear goals helps you envision your desired future and create a roadmap to achieve those goals. It gives you a sense of purpose and direction, making decision making more focused and intentional. It also helps in the process of rebuilding your life after a significant life change.

A: Professional support, such as coaching or therapy, can provide valuable guidance and insights during this challenging time. It can assist in gaining clarity, processing emotions, and making informed choices.

Transformational coaches or therapists can offer tools and techniques to help you navigate through the decision-making process more effectively.

A: Gathering information allows you to make informed decisions. Conduct research, seek reliable resources, and gather all relevant information related to the choices you need to make. This will help you evaluate different options and make choices that align with your desired outcomes.

each option aligns with your goals and values. This process will help you make rational decisions based on a thorough evaluation.